Late night

“Of course, the big story is that the Obamas got their new puppy! How about that, huh? On Fox News, they declared that the dog is a Muslim socialist.” –Jay Leno

“No, it’s a Portuguese water dog, which sounds like something you order in a bar, doesn’t it?” –Jay Leno

“Of course, the hardest thing these days about paper-training a puppy is finding a newspaper that’s still in business.” –Jay Leno

“Barack Obama’s daughters are very smart. They told him they will take the same responsibility for the dog that he is taking for the economy. That way, if the dog leaves a mess in the White House, it’ll be cleaned up by future generations.” –Jay Leno

“Actually, this has become a first family tradition. All the first families have had a dog. The Obamas have Bo, that’s the name of the dog. The Bushes had Barney. The Clintons, of course, had Bill.” –Jay Leno